Back during finals week at school, someone asked me what I
was looking forward to most about going to China. My answer was—and I knew at the
time it sounded a bit selfish but it was truth—“Being alone.”
The person I was talking to looked a little puzzled. “That
seems a little out of character for you,” they said.
“Maybe it is,” I admitted, but it was the truth. “I just
miss how in Europe, I relied on myself to do things. All I had to worry about
was what I was doing and the things I could fit in my little backpack. I couldn’t
communicate with anyone, no one could find me, I could come and go and do what
I wanted. It was just really nice to be alone.”
Since I got here, I’ve been very torn. It’s been nice having
the other interns to talk to and do things with, but it hasn’t been the
immersive experience I was hoping for. Some of the times I’ve gone out by
myself have been the most memorable. I’ve been very stuck on this fence of do I keep doing things with them or do I just take care of myself.
This was a debate I was having yesterday (June 8th)
morning as I was cleaning my apartment. My very good friend Bryan is working in
Souzhou, China this summer and was coming to visit along with our other friend
Johnny and one of Bryan’s co-workers Emily (all three of whom are American’s
working in China for the summer.) Their train was set to arrive in Shanghai at
9:30am. I had given them directions to meet me at Jiang’su Road station on line
2 at exit 4. Bryan thought they would be there about 10:00.
When 10:00 came around, I was just getting out of the
shower. I tried texting Bryan but didn’t get an answer. I decided I would just
go hang out at the station and hope to bump into them. The pedestrian traffic
was significantly lighter since it was Sunday so it only took me about 10
minutes to get to the station. As I walked down the steps, I turned the corner
and saw three white faces.
I heard one of them say, “Oh look a white person…wait its
Zach!” It was Johnny. By perfect timing, we’d arrived at the exact same moment.
We greeted each other and decided to go drop their stuff off
at my apartment. They were pretty impressed by the cushy set-up I have going
on. Bryan’s only suggestion was that it might be nicer if it was in a penthouse
with a private elevator.
“I’ll request that for my next internship,” I said.
They wanted to get started with the sightseeing right away,
but first John was hungry. I took them too the noodle house we’d been frequenting
lately. This was my first time going without a Chinese speaker so I figured it
could be interesting.
We walked in and the girl behind the register stood up.
“Chicken,” I said, holding up 4 fingers and pointing to each
of us. She said something in Chinese and I shrugged to indicate I didn’t understand.
She began pointing at things on the menu, but they were all written in Chinese
(without any picture) so I just continued shrugging. She finally called over an
older woman who was wearing a hijab. My assumption is that the older woman was
her mother, as it appears to be a family owned place (everyone wears some type
of Muslim head covering.)
“Beef?” the mother said.
“Chicken,” I said.“Rice?” she said.
“Noodles,” I said. She nodded and punched it into the cash register. John wanted some of the soup that was pictured so we ordered three orders of the “chicken and noodles one word special” while he pointed at the photo on the menu.
Taking a seat, they soon brought our food. It was unlike any
dish I’d had there before, but it was really good. I’m not sure it had chicken
in it, so much as egg, but I guess that’s in the same family. The spicy food is
good, but too much of it really irritates my stomach. I’m yet to be able to
finish a whole serving of anything.
But Bryan polished off all of his while Emily and I ate as
much as we could. As we did we regaled each other with stories of our lives in
China. Bryan has been here for a month now, I’ve been here for 2 weeks, Johnny
has been here for a week, and Emily for about 3 days. In that time, we’ve all
eaten some pretty scary things. Their most frightening meal appeared to be
eating these little fried fish whole.
“I’ve pretty much gotten used to bones,” Bryan said. “We’ve
had enough dinners with people where it felt rude not to eat so I just kind of
figured it out.”
I can’t decide if I hope to get to that place or if I’m
giving up and will consider bones one of those “unique experiences I’m glad I
had.”
As they told me more about getting lost in the Souzhou
subway and exploring parts of the city late at night, I did become fascinated. “I’ve
been picturing you like biking up dirt roads for the past month,” I told Bryan.
“Oh no,” he said. “It is a small town…of 10 million people.
So ya it’s pretty modern.” I’m hoping to go there next weekend (once they
figure out their work schedule) to get see a bit more of a “Chinese city” in
China—with less ex-pat influence than Shanghai.
We did kind of a world-win tour of all the sites. We started
at Jiang Temple, strolled through the pedestrian street of Nanjing Road, and ended
up at the bund for photos. Just as last time, lots of hagglers tried selling
us, particularly on those wheel shoes. When one haggler came down to 5RMB,
Johnny decided to take him up on it. Just after handing over his 5RMB note, the
man explained that the 5 only covered the bag the shoes came in; he wanted more
for the skates. John declined, and surprisingly, the man returned his money.
“It’s definitely a very safe country,” Bryan said as we were
walking along. I’d made the same observation. I see a lot of little kids riding
the subway alone, and a lot of the hagglers leave their booths set up
overnight.
“I read yesterday that their investment in their domestic
police is higher than their investment in national security,” I said. We also
discussed the fact that there have been two very public shootings in the US
since we left, while we’ve been very safe over in the East.
We actually debated gun safety a lot over the weekend. It’s
curious that Switzerland and China rank very similarly in crime rates.
Interestingly, Switzerland everyone owns a gun while no one (but the police)
have guns in China. Also interestingly, the majority of the Swiss population is
very rich, while the average Chinese population ranks fairly poor. Somehow,
both ends of the spectrum have accomplished solving the gun violence problem
that the US is currently debating. It does seem to imply that perhaps guns are
not at the root of the problem, although either extreme is a viable solution to
solve it.
We took lots of photos at the Bund, and I pulled out my book
to try and determine what some of the historical buildings are. Many of them
were founded as either financial centers or hotels during the 1800’s and many
still remain the same today. Interestingly, the famous view of Shanghai (the
one that comes up if you Google Image “Shanghai”) is actually of Pudong. While
still technically part of Shanghai proper, Pudong and Shanghai have a similar
association as Newark and New York City.
After the Bund, we headed to Yuyuan Gardens. It took me
awhile to remember how to get there, but we made the walk and wound our way
back through the streets. The shop where you can make your own candy smelled
fantastic. We also got a few whiffs of the Chinese delicacy of “stinky tofu”
which smelled like sewage.
Bryan really is a celebrity everywhere he goes. Because of
his blonde hair, people are often taking candid shots of him or asking him to
pose with them for photos. Traveling in his entourage, we all got to be part of
the paparazzi fun.
As soon as we got into the gardens, we lost Johnny. We
walked around for about twenty minutes trying to find him and saw all kinds of
different parts of the garden I hadn’t seen before. When we finally met up, we
took some time to wonder and take photos. We found a nice rock outcropping by
one of the coy ponds and sat to catch up. It had been a while since we’d really
caught up and we talked about school, the end of the semester, plans after
graduation, future destinations we’d like to travel to. It was really fun.
We also started playing a game to guess where other tourists
were from. Since tourists do kind of stand out, it’s pretty easy to spot them.
From their body language, clothing, and occasionally an accent, we tried to
figure out where different people were from. Maybe not the most politically correct
game, but it was fun.
After the gardens, we decided we wanted something to drink.
I suggest mango smoothies and we agreed they sounded good. The problem was, I didn’t
really know how to get back to Charmant. Bryan however had something in his
travel kit that I don’t; cellular data. While the backpacker in me felt like it
was cheating just a little, we used Google maps to navigate our way across town
for smoothies.
“Zach I’ve walked 45 minutes for this smoothie,” Johnny said.
“If it is not totally bomb, you’re paying.”
We found Charmant and were seated at the same table they put
Nate, Jessica, Dayana, and I. I’m thinking maybe this is the foreigners table
because it is pretty well hidden (out of sight, out mind type of thing.) I
ordered two mango smoothies—by pointing at the menu—so that we could share.
When they came, everyone was satisfied. The flavor is just
so fresh and unreal. We enjoyed them—and debated ordering more—before heading
out to find a restaurant for dinner.
As I mentioned, Bryan has been here for a month. He has told
me on several occasions that he is craving Mexican food. While I feel like
jumping continents is still a bad idea, I couldn’t really blame him. I texted
John (my boss) who gave us a couple of recommendations.
The place we went to was called Mex & Co. It was very
Chipotle-esque, with a build your own burrito set up. I created something close
to my standard order back home, and paired it with a Fanta to drink. I have to
say, it was not by any means the best Mexican food I’ve had. It kind of smelled
like cat food and while the flavor wasn’t terrible, it was very much spiced
like Chinese food instead of Mexican. Emily and I only ate about half of ours.
Bryan scarfed his down with a side of guacamole, and Johnny got Chinese food.
After dinner we went to Tianzifang to roam the alleys and
see the nightlife. We went into a lot of different areas than I had with the
other interns. Bryan pointed something out to me. A lot of what was being sold
at the shops were things that used to be popular in the US. They were things like
McDonald’s toys for movies that came out last year. There were brand name items
where the logos were mis-spelled (For example, Bryan found a cell phone case
with a Boeing 777 on it, but the logo read “Boeino.”) In the business school—particularly
in the ethics club—we’ve talked about companies that can’t sell old or damaged
merchandise dumping it in China. Apparently, shops like this were where it
ended up.
We grabbed some gelato before heading back to the apartment.
When we got back, we attempted to get on the roof to take photos, but the
balcony was closed for the night. Instead, we went to my room and enjoyed the
neon lights (that were still on…the city shuts down pretty fast starting at
9:00 and is completely closed by about 11:00.)
In the morning, we were all dragging. According to Emily’s
pedometer, we’d walked 17 miles yesterday. We grabbed pastries at 85 for
breakfast before taking the Subway to Pudong.
It was fascinating being on the other side of the river. One
of the buildings that is under construction will be the second tallest building
in the world when it is finished (supposedly this summer.) The pearl tower with
its giant pink globes is also impressive. What I think was the coolest though
was the “sky bridge.” If the Charles Bridge in Prague takes you back in the
past, this jumps you into the future. It is a glass bridge that literally walks
above many of the main roads so that pedestrians are several stories about the traffic.
We also got to see the Bund from this side looking back.
Looking into Pudong looks like a vision of the 21st century. Looking
back to Shanghai looks more like a glimpse at 1920. The streets are lined with
old architecture, however, sci-fi looking structures also jut up in the
background.
Our next stop on the whirlwind tour of Shanghai was
Xitiandi. We skipped the house museum this time, but we did go to the Communist
Party of China (CPC) museum. My guidebook had said we would need passports—which
had caused some confusion and several trips back to the apartment this morning—but
this fact appeared to be false.
The display was interesting. After passing through security
(which was really the most advanced screening I’ve been through in China—the
guards laughed at my money belt when I took it out) we went upstairs to the
exhibit. As we looked at old photos, signs and placards explained that life in
China had been rough in the early 1900’s. Famine was sweeping across China and
the government continually raised taxes and took from the citizens. Many of the
photos looked skeletal as we walked along reading about all the problems facing
China. Gradually, as Marxism and Leninism took hold in Russia, the ideals
spread to various towns in China. Shanghai was selected for a meeting and in
this building, delegates from various groups around China came together to form
the Communist Party of China (CPC.) Together, they drafted a series of demands
and outlined a new form of government that would be beneficial for the citizens
I realize there is probably some bias to the museum, but I
have to admit, the story doesn’t seem crazy. In fact, it seems familiar. A
tyrannical government unfairly taxing its citizens, so a group of leaders join
together to form a new government. I feel like we celebrate a very similar
story every 4th of July. Regardless of if it is completely the true
way it happened, I think it demonstrates that most people are acting with the
best of intentions.
After the museum, we got back on the subway so Bryan could
show us a cheap restaurant he’s been to in Shanghai. On the subway, we all
looked beat. We admitted that we pushed it really fast and might have overdone
it just a bit.
The restaurant he took us to was in another mall. Johnny and
I got distracted by a goofy electronic abs workout (one of those vibrating
things you stand on and it shakes your body to tone your abs.) We each did a
demo cycle on it and felt totally ridiculous shaking in the mall. It honestly
made me realize how thin I’ve gotten. I really have sort of wasted away. My
legs seem twiggy thin now when I see my reflection, and when I get out of the
shower, I’ve noticed my stomach is rapidly flattening.
Emily and Johnny decided to skip Chinese food and browse the
food court. Bryan ordered for him and I at the restaurant. He got some soup
with fungus in it while I got something with black beans. Mine was super spicy.
Unlike other spicy dishes, this one hit me in the sinuses. My nose started to
run, and after a while I started to burp. Once again, half the serving was
plenty for me.
We’d been joking about foot massages since they’d gotten to
Shanghai. They hadn’t yet tried a Chinese massage parlor and my place was
pretty cheap. We caught the subway and headed over there. It was a chaotic and
confusing experience trying to communicate with the staff that we wanted 4 foot
massages, but we eventually got settled, Johnny and Emily upstairs and Bryan
and I downstairs.
We each had different masseuses and as a result, very
different massages. Johnny found his quite ticklish while Bryan and Emily found
it a bit painful. Emily was satisfied when it was done, while Bryan was not
completely sure it was all it was cracked up to be. Mine was definitely
ticklish, but once I relaxed, I actually fell asleep.
In some way, we all caught a second wind from the massages.
We walked over the supermarket I’d been using and Bryan and I got gelato.
Sitting in the food court, we talked about life and travel and what we learn
from getting outside our comfort zones. Johnny has always been a collector of
poetry and he shared a few good lines with us from some of his favorites.
“It always helps me through dark times,” he said. We talked about
that idea too.
“We all need some dark times,” I added. “In a lot of ways, I
think my Dad’s accident hardened me. But I do think I’m a better person because
I went through that.”
“That was almost two years ago?” Bryan asked. I nodded. “Hard
to believe.”
“Yep,” I agreed.
From there, we only had about 2 hours until they needed to
leave so we went back to my apartment. We hung out and talked a little while
they started planning a trip for their week off in a few weeks. Our other
friend Luke will have joined them by then, and the plan is for Luke and I to go
somewhere while Bryan, Johnny, and Emily go to Beijing. (I plan to see Beijing
in July after I finish working and Luke is going to Beijing with his parent
this fall.)"Do we do both?" Bryan asked the group.
"You know," I interjected. "When I was in Prague, you talked me into going to Rome by reminding me that it was easier to pack at a lot in while I was there than to try and go back later. You might as well do as much as you can while you can."
Bryan remembered the conversation and agreed. “You could meet us in Xi’an,” Bryan said, “and we can go tour around there. Then Luke and you can come back to Shanghai so you can work, and we can go on to Beijing.”
That sounded like a plan. Of course, the best laid plans often fall apart. That one fell apart before they even left. As they were on their way to the door, they got a call from their boss that their work schedule is being rearranged.
“It’s funny,” I said. “I really don’t want you guys to
leave.” It’s always fun seeing Johnny, even though we lived a long ways away.
Emily was fun to hang out with and it was a pleasure to meet her. And Bryan
really has become a true backpacker in his month here. He has a great style of
being flexible, getting lost, and seeing everything as an adventure. It was fun
having some people to go on adventures with.
“We’ll figure
something out,” Bryan said. “We’ll definitely see you again, even though it
might be briefly.”
“And we can Skype!” Johnny said.
I walked with them back to the Subway station where we first
met. We hugged and said goodbye. “Not goodbye,” John said, “See you soon.”
“Thank you for everything,” Emily said. “For hosting us,
touring us around, showing us cheap stuff. It was great.”
“My pleasure,” I said. “I really am glad you came.”
We waved and they headed down into the station.
As I walked back to my apartment, I suddenly became very
angry. I’d wanted so badly to be alone, but now I don’t. Hanging out with Bryan—just
like old times—catching up with John, and meeting Emily, it had all broken down
this wall of bitterness I’ve put up. From school projects, to travelling, to
living on my own at school, I’ve always wanted to be self-sufficient and prided
myself on “not needing anyone’s company” to do it all. All of a sudden, that
feels like a bunch of garbage.
For the first time I can remember since Scout camp, I feel
homesick. I want to go hug my parents, I want to see my friends, I want to go
back and just be with all the people I love—from church, scouts, school. All of
a sudden, in a city of 23million people…I feel alone.
In a small way, I’m happy that this has left me so
distraught. I guess even when I wanted to be alone, I knew I didn’t really want
it. I’ve always loved being around people (I get that from my Mom) and I guess
I just needed a reminder. In a way, I feel like a burden has been lifted. This
debate of to do it alone or not alone has been really troubling me
and now I realize it doesn’t matter. I have the skills to do travel on my own,
but that doesn’t mean that traveling with other people will hold me back. What’s
more important is that I push through the homesickness, get through the hard
times, and take risks to discover more about China and about myself.
It really was an awesome weekend! I’m totally feeling better
and ready to get back to work tomorrow! Onward to the next adventure! (But first, I'm going to Skype my parents)
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